Younger siblings of Grace O’Malley-Kumar and Barnaby Webber speak out about grief and loss following Nottingham killings

The families of Grace O’Malley-Kumar and Barnaby Webber are still trying to navigate a world forever changed by the tragic events of June 13, 2023.

At a recent public inquiry into the killings, the younger brothers of the two university students shared deeply personal accounts of life after losing their “heroes,” revealing the profound and ongoing grief that shadows their daily lives.

Remembering Grace Through Small Acts

James O’Malley-Kumar, 19, spoke candidly about how he keeps his sister close even though she is gone.

Sleeping with her hockey T-shirt under his pillow and wearing her jewelry in tribute, he described a bond that transcends her death.

“She’d blaze a trail for me and I’d follow,” James said.

“But now I’m 19 and Grace is stuck at 19. I’m lost, really lost.”

His words painted a picture of a young man caught between memories of a sister who was vibrant, ambitious, and full of life, and the stark absence left behind.

Charlie Webber’s Daily Struggle With Loss

Charlie Webber, 18, shared a similar pain over losing his older brother Barnaby.

“There’s not a second in a day where I don’t think about him,” he said.

Charlie recalled their final long car journey together before Barnaby was killed, a memory now bittersweet.

The inquiry heard firsthand how these deaths continue to shape the siblings’ daily routines, college experiences, and relationships.

The Night of the Killings

Grace O’Malley-Kumar and Barnaby Webber, both 19, were fatally stabbed by 34-year-old Valdo Calocane in Nottingham as they walked home from university.

On the same night, caretaker Ian Coates, 65, was also killed before Calocane stole his van and drove into pedestrians, seriously injuring three more people.

Ian Coates’ son described his father as “a massive kid” with a love for fishing and football, expressing deep regret at not showing his father enough affection while he was alive.

Calocane pleaded guilty to manslaughter on the grounds of diminished responsibility and is now serving an indefinite hospital order.

Families Share Heartbreaking Tributes

The inquiry heard emotional tributes from both families.

Barney’s father, Dave Webber, urged people to remember his son as a “fantastic bundle of energy and life.”

His mother, Emma Webber, described how Barnaby, who had considered a career as an RAF pilot, was “just coming into manhood” and “really good company.”

She has tattoos commemorating both her children, blending their initials, university colors, and symbols representing Grace and Barnaby.

Grace’s parents, Sanjoy Kumar and Sinéad O’Malley-Kumar, spoke of the void left in their home.

Sanjoy, a GP, recalled how Grace “literally brought the music” into their lives, while Sinéad, reflecting on her daughter’s athletic achievements, described Grace as her “best friend.”

She shared the pain of seeing a future stolen — dreams of graduating from medical school, starting a family, and building a life that will never happen.

Systemic Failures Highlighted

The inquiry explored how the killings might have been prevented, highlighting what experts called “entirely predictable structural, systemic, and individual failure.”

Calocane had been sectioned four times over three years yet was repeatedly released despite concerns about his deteriorating mental health.

He had a documented history of violence, including assaults at his workplace, and was wanted on an outstanding warrant for allegedly attacking an emergency worker — information missed by the responding police officer.

Critical police evidence was not shared properly, and the Coates family first learned of Ian’s death through social media.

Calocane had misled medical professionals, refusing specific treatments due to needle fears, and disengaged from his specialized mental health team months before the attacks.

The inquiry, chaired by retired judge Deborah Taylor, is examining whether police, healthcare services, and other agencies missed opportunities to intervene.

The Daily Reality for James and Charlie

For James and Charlie, the inquiry and legal proceedings cannot fill the void left by Grace and Barnaby.

They face milestones and challenges without the guidance of their older siblings, navigating adolescence and early adulthood under a shadow of loss.

Three additional victims were injured when Calocane drove the stolen van into pedestrians.

Wayne Birkett, one of the survivors, expressed survivor’s guilt, saying he “wished his life had been taken rather than those of Grace, Barney, and Ian.”

What’s Next

The inquiry will continue to examine the series of failings that preceded the killings, with the aim of identifying reforms to prevent similar tragedies in the future.

Families hope for accountability from law enforcement, mental health services, and other agencies involved.

Meanwhile, the younger siblings are left to process grief while attempting to build lives without the guiding presence of Grace and Barnaby.

Summary

James O’Malley-Kumar and Charlie Webber have opened up about the immense grief of losing their older siblings in the June 2023 Nottingham attacks.

Grace O’Malley-Kumar and Barnaby Webber, both 19, were killed by Valdo Calocane, who also murdered caretaker Ian Coates and injured several others.

The public inquiry has revealed systemic failures by police and mental health services that may have contributed to the tragedy.

Families continue to mourn the loss while calling for accountability and reform.

If you are struggling with grief or thoughts of suicide, please contact the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline at 988 for confidential support. You are not alone.