Maria Shriver, the esteemed journalist and former First Lady of California, has shared the emotional and painful aftermath of her split from Arnold Schwarzenegger.
In a revealing new excerpt from her upcoming poetry book I Am Maria, Shriver reflects on the deep scars left by her husband’s shocking revelation in 2011.
The Betrayal That Shattered Her World
In 2011, Maria Shriver’s world was turned upside down when Arnold Schwarzenegger confessed to fathering a child with their housekeeper, Mildred Baena, during their marriage.
The child, Joseph Baena, was born in 1997, and Maria had no idea about his existence until Schwarzenegger admitted the truth years later.
The discovery of this infidelity marked the beginning of a painful and life-altering chapter for Shriver, who had been married to Arnold since 1986 and shared four children with him.
The shock of the betrayal was compounded by other personal losses.
Shriver had recently lost both of her parents, Eunice and Sargent Shriver, and had relinquished her role as First Lady of California after Arnold’s term ended.
This combination of personal and public upheaval took a heavy toll on her.
“It broke my heart, it broke my spirit, it broke what was left of me,” she writes, describing the devastating sequence of events.
Grappling with Grief and Finding Her Identity
Shriver describes a deep sense of grief and confusion as she tried to navigate the aftermath of the split.
She felt lost and unsure of who she was without her marriage, parents, and career.
In the midst of it all, she had to face a confusing mix of emotions: anger, fear, sadness, and anxiety.
The overwhelming sense of loss and betrayal made it difficult for her to move forward.
However, during a vulnerable moment in a hotel room, Shriver realized that this heartbreak didn’t have to define her future. “Maria, this doesn’t have to be the end of you,” she thought to herself.
The Healing Journey: Therapy, Spirituality, and Poetry
In her quest to heal, Shriver sought solace from a range of sources.
She visited therapists, psychics, and even a cloistered convent in search of guidance and comfort.
During her time at the convent, a nun, Mother Dolores, offered words of wisdom that helped Shriver realize that her journey wasn’t about seeking permission to stay in her marriage but rather permission to rediscover herself.
“I think what you’re really looking for, my child, is permission to leave your marriage, to be Maria,” the nun told her.
It was through this process of deep self-exploration that Shriver turned to poetry as a tool for healing.
Writing from a place of deep pain, Shriver unearthed parts of herself that had long been repressed—fears of not living up to expectations, struggles with grief, and a sense of inadequacy.
Through her poetry, she began to release the emotional weight she had carried for years.
“When that lifetime of dissociated grief and trauma is released, it rushes out like a tsunami,” she explains.
The Divorce, Reflection, and Moving Forward
Shriver and Schwarzenegger officially separated in 2011, and their divorce was finalized a decade later in 2021.
Schwarzenegger has since spoken candidly about his infidelity, calling it his “biggest failure” and expressing deep regret for the pain he caused his family.
Despite the turmoil, Schwarzenegger and Shriver have managed to maintain a positive relationship as co-parents to their children.
The actor has also built a strong bond with his son, Joseph, attending his graduation from Pepperdine University in 2019 and continuing to be involved in his life.
Reflecting on the affair, Schwarzenegger acknowledges that he will live with the consequences of his actions for the rest of his life.
“I’m very happy within this sad story that Maria and I were able to raise the kids well,” he said.
As Maria Shriver continues her journey of healing, she remains dedicated to finding peace and strength within herself.
Her book I Am Maria offers readers a powerful and personal glimpse into her life, revealing the resilience and courage it took to rebuild her identity after such a public and personal betrayal.