...By Henry George for TDPel Media.
Laura’s relationship with her boyfriend has been off for the past few months, with him displaying a lack of interest and not putting in any effort to the relationship.
This phenomenon, also known as “quiet dumping”, has become increasingly prevalent, with many people sharing their experiences of it on social media.
“Quiet dumping” refers to when one partner chooses to do the bare minimum required to date the other without breaking up with them.
They may have lost interest in the relationship, but they are not ready to be the one to end it.
The origin of “quiet dumping”
The term “quiet dumping” was first attributed to TikTok comedy creator Daniel Hentschel, who defined it as a situation where one partner chooses to do the bare minimum required to date the other without breaking up with them.
The hashtag “quiet dumping” now has over 28 million views on TikTok, with the majority of videos detailing people’s experiences with it, giving advice on what to do if you find yourself being quietly dumped and arguing that it’s worse than being ghosted.
Why “quiet dumping” hurts
According to relationship coach Sabrina Bendory, “quiet dumping” can be extremely hurtful for the person that’s being quietly dumped, and common signs include a lack of enthusiasm for the relationship, being bumped for something more important, and a distance that hangs in the air.
While leaving a relationship is not an easy decision, staying in an unfurling relationship instead of leaving can be equally as painful.
Nikki, who was in a three-year relationship, did not mean to quietly dump her partner, but in hindsight, she realized that she had done so.
Her focus shifted to her university studies and what she wanted to do after graduation, and her partner at the time used to badger her about making more effort.
In the end, her boyfriend broke things off with her, citing that she seemingly had no interest in fixing things.
Jacob Lucas’ advice
Jacob Lucas, author of the dating guide book ‘Her Dating Coach,’ advises asking your partner why they are checking out of the relationship and seeing if you can communicate effectively to overcome any problems.
If your partner clearly does not want to make an effort to get the relationship back on track, then it may be time to leave.
Conclusion: Honesty and open communication
The phenomenon of “quiet dumping” is just one of the many niche dating terms that have emerged in recent years.
While it may be subjective whether it is worse than other behaviors such as ghosting or breadcrumbing, the important thing is to be honest and open about how you really feel.