It’s easy to look at someone’s life from the outside and think they’ve got it all together.
A nice family, a successful job, an enviable social circle — what could possibly be wrong? But as I learned the hard way, anxiety doesn’t care how perfect your circumstances might look.
About fifteen years ago, I was diagnosed with generalised anxiety disorder.
It crept up on me in ways I couldn’t explain — sleepless nights, constant exhaustion, brain fog, and an overwhelming sense that something terrible was about to happen.
Even simple tasks like getting my children ready for school or paying a bill would send me spiralling.
Struggling in Silence
At that time, I felt utterly defeated. I wore the same black clothes every day, forgot everything important, and existed in a haze of dread.
Strangely, I had no reason to feel this way.
My life on paper looked enviable — I was surrounded by opportunities, friends in high places, and all the trappings of success. Yet inside, I felt like a complete failure.
That’s the cruel thing about mental illness. It makes no logical sense and is often invisible to those around you.
The Pill I Didn’t Want to Take
Eventually, I was prescribed antidepressants. To me, that felt like admitting weakness.
I grew up in a generation where even taking a paracetamol was frowned upon, so the thought of relying on stronger medication terrified me.
But the truth was, I hated myself so much that I didn’t have much to lose.
When I finally took them, they helped. They quieted the noise in my head, gave me enough clarity to function, and allowed me to stand up straight again.
Yes, they dulled some emotions too, but it was a trade-off I could live with.
Why Functioning Matters
I didn’t have the luxury of checking out of life.
My children needed me, my work kept me grounded, and my family life gave me structure.
Even though it sometimes felt like scaling a mountain, I knew I had to keep going.
Which is why I find it worrying that record numbers of people — around 650,000 by July, and growing daily — are now on disability benefits for anxiety.
Anxiety Is Not the Same as Disability
Let me be clear: mental illness is real, and in its acute stages, people absolutely need support.
Some are so unwell that work is impossible. But for many, the worst thing you can do is encourage them to give up on living.
Anxiety is a disorder that can be treated, not a life sentence that requires you to withdraw from society.
Having a purpose — whether that’s a job, children, or even a dog to walk — can be part of the healing process.
Left unchecked, too much time to dwell can deepen the spiral.
What Support Should Really Look Like
Support should come in the form of therapy, medication, and tackling root problems such as poor education, substance abuse, or lack of opportunity.
Simply throwing money at the problem and telling people it’s fine to retreat from life doesn’t help anyone.
Most people who suffer from anxiety, myself included, want the same thing: to feel normal again.
And the best way to get there is by being active, useful, and engaged in the world — not sitting back and letting the disorder define you.
When the NHS Gets It Wrong
On another worrying note, I can’t help but question how an NHS doctor who publicly praised terrorist attacks and shared antisemitic views is still employed.
Dr Rahmeh Aladwan, a trainee surgeon, faced calls for suspension, but the Medical Practitioners Tribunal Service let her continue in her role.
Patients deserve to feel safe, and such views have no place in a hospital.
Rooney’s Honest Reflection
Wayne Rooney recently admitted that without his wife Coleen’s support, he believes he wouldn’t be alive today.
It’s a rare thing for someone in the public eye to be so open about the role their partner plays in keeping them steady, and it’s a reminder that none of us get through life entirely on our own.
Joanna Lumley and Other National Obsessions
A new survey listed Britain’s favourite obsessions — from the Royal Family and the weather to dogs and biscuits.
Personally, my own obsession didn’t make the cut: Joanna Lumley.
She is charm, wit, and grace personified, no wonder even the King counts her among his friends.
A Little Culinary Failure
On a lighter note, I recently tried to recreate the perfect roast potatoes that friends made while on holiday.
The result? A disaster that left my children sorely disappointed. A reminder, perhaps, that some culinary feats are best left to the true geniuses.