When political theatre meets international diplomacy, you’d expect a bit of gravitas—maybe even some charm.
But as French President Emmanuel Macron wrapped up his state visit to the UK with a press conference at Northwood military headquarters in Hertfordshire, what unfolded was part spectacle, part eyebrow-raiser.
Standing next to him was Sir Keir Starmer, who somehow managed to fade into the background, despite being co-host of the event.
Let’s just say the vibes were less “historic summit” and more “awkward school presentation,” with Macron soaking up the spotlight and Starmer… well, just soaking.
Macron’s Flair for Drama Takes Centre Stage
Macron, as ever, was all about presentation.
Dressed in a waistcoat despite the summer heat and with sideburns longer than Starmer’s entire visible personality, he was clearly ready for his close-up.
His gestures were theatrical, his voice forceful, and his energy palpable.
The president tilted his head often—maybe to show off that carefully combed-over patch of hair, or maybe just to command even more attention.
And command it he did.
While Starmer answered questions in his usual cautious, subdued manner—biting his lip, mumbling about being “serious”—Macron exploded into long, impassioned speeches.
Think: monologues from a French tragedy, delivered with the kind of intensity that could light up a room… or burn it down.
Brexit Gets Blamed (Again)
As the press conference dragged on, one topic took over Macron’s mind: Brexit.
He railed against it, painting it as a disaster for trade, diplomacy, and basically everything.
Oddly enough, he also boasted that Anglo-French trade was now higher than it was when the UK was in the EU—something that didn’t quite square with his doomsday tone.
He claimed Brits were lied to, especially on the issue of illegal immigration, saying that the EU wasn’t the problem.
But then came the contradiction: Belgium has done a far better job than France at stopping the infamous small boats.
Could the real issue be less about “Europe” and more about, well… Macron?
A Translator Turns Passion into Paperwork
Macron’s intense speeches were delivered with gusto, but the translator relaying them into English had a completely different vibe—calm, dry, and borderline bureaucratic.
It was like watching a live wire being interpreted by an accountant reading terms and conditions.
The passion got lost somewhere between Macron’s raised eyebrows and the translator’s spreadsheet tone.
Still, the message came through: Macron had a lot to say.
Most of it was hard to follow. But he said it with great conviction.
The Media Gets Its Moment
When ITV’s Robert Peston got his turn to ask a question, he didn’t hold back.
He even spoke French—props for that—and called out France for taking £700 million of UK money with little to show in terms of stopping the boats.
Peston then cheekily asked if Macron and Starmer, both representing a “slightly beleaguered class of centrist leaders,” had been swapping survival tips.
Neither man found it funny. Starmer got defensive, insisting that social democracy still had answers, while Macron launched into another deep philosophical detour—just short of bringing up Brexit again—before being metaphorically whisked offstage.
An Exit Full of Egos and Eye-Rolls
By the end of it all, Macron had dominated the room, delivering drama and double-speak in equal measure.
Starmer looked like he was wondering why he showed up.
And journalists, though entertained, were probably left with more questions than answers.
Whether Macron’s performance made an impression on UK politics is debatable.
But one thing’s for sure—he definitely made it all about him.
And honestly, that might have been the whole point.